Part One: The Accident and The Bolter
‘The Bolter’ is the 29th track from The Tortured Poets Department: The Anthology, the 11th studio album by Taylor Swift. Unlike any other song, ‘The Bolter’ conveys a message about Taylor that is both eye-opening and a bit concerning.
To start off, Taylor shares a very important experience that will serve as a point of comparison later on in the chorus: an accident at the age of six where she almost drowned in what we can assume was a frozen pond or lake. This experience is particularly important, as later on Taylor will compare this near-death experience to her experiences ending abusive relationships.
The first verse also reveals a critical piece of information in the lines
‘And I can confirm she made
a curious child, ever reviled
by everyone except her own father’
It is unknown if these lines along with the drowning accident are a true reflection of Taylor’s childhood or a mere metaphor. Nevertheless, these lines can be interpreted shockingly: Taylor was a victim of emotional neglect as a child by her family except by her own father. This comes off as a shocking revelation, as Taylor has always expressed her love and closeness to her mother in different songs and interviews.
But why is this interpretation important? It sets up a critical piece of information to understand Taylor’s behavior in relationships. Throughout the song, Taylor speaks about feeling the need to escape a relationship once she gets close to someone, like in the lines
‘Excellent fun ’til you get to know her
then she runs like it’s a race’
being this act of escaping relationships constantly the reason that she is called ‘the Bolter’ behind her back.
Taylor continues to express how she feels relieved when she finally manages to run away from an abusive relationship, comparing the feeling of escaping to the time she almost drowned when she was a child.
‘But as she was leaving it felt like breathing’
‘It feels like the time she fell through the ice then came out alive’
Part Two: The Littlest Leaks
However, the song takes an unexpected turn in the second verse, where Taylor recalls a past relationship with a man that she considered a ’bad man’. She recalls making him ‘actually care’ about her and actually having a good time in this relationship. But, surprisingly, Taylor recognizes her need to escape once again as soon as she perceives the tiniest of issues in the relationship.
‘What a charming Saturday!
That’s when she sees the littlest leaks
down in the floorboards
and she just knows she must bolt’
These lines of the second verse are an extremely powerful recognition from Taylor, as she’s finally acknowledging her need to escape a relationship even when things haven’t reached the point of being abusive. As soon as she starts seeing even the tiniest problem in a relationship, she ‘just knows’ she needs to escape.
With this interpretation in mind, a possible explanation for Taylor’s behavior in relationships can be constructed: due to the emotional neglect she received as a child, Taylor fears emotional intimacy with a potential partner and feels the urge to run away as soon as she starts getting close to someone and/or when she feels like she’s in potential danger, even if the danger is not actual abuse but just ‘the littlest leaks’.
Furthermore, Taylor adds during the bridge of the song the following
‘First, they’re off to the races
And she’s laughing, drawing aces’
These lines can be interpreted in several ways: first off, Taylor has a history of referencing ‘aces’ as a ‘winning move’ or as a move where she gains the upper hand. An example of this is shown in ‘New Romantics’, the closing track of Taylor’s 5th studio album, 1989, where she expresses she’s ‘about to play my Ace’ in the face of a decaying relationship.
So, with this context in mind, in these lines, we can see that her potential partners are ‘off to the races’, which is a metaphor for her partners betting on her and their relationship. But Taylor always finds herself ‘drawing aces’, which is a clear reference to her action of exiting a relationship to maintain the emotional advantage and avoid getting hurt.
However, Taylor herself acknowledges two more things in the following lines:
‘But none of it is changing
that the chariot is waiting’
The first thing is that she plays this exact same move of exiting relationships over and over and the exact same cycle repeats over and over: Taylor falls in love with someone new and at some point, she exits the relationship whether it’s by abuse and/or over the fear of emotional intimacy with someone and potentially getting hurt. Secondly, Taylor recognizes that she has the desire for emotional intimacy, for an ‘ideal love’ in the form of a ‘chariot that is waiting’. Taylor has the desire for true human connection, to be loved and respected, and to feel safe. But none of it is changing as she plays the same move over and over.
Part Three: Recognition is not Betterment
In other songs, such as ‘Dear Reader’, the closing track from Taylor’s 10th studio album Midnights, Taylor has expressed her own self-doubt in the face of heartbreak. This information poses a very important question: does Taylor feel self-doubt because of a failed relationship? Or is one of the reasons her relationships constantly fail and feels the need to escape relationships because of her self-doubt as a partner? It can be interpreted that because Taylor was emotionally neglected as a child, she might not feel enough for others, hence her fear of emotional intimacy and her urge to escape before she ‘disappoints’ her partner for ‘not being enough’.
With all this in mind, it is become clear that ‘The Bolter’ reveals very insightful, yet concerning revelations about Taylor’s behaviors in relationships. Personally, I cannot recall any other song where Taylor manages to recognize this non-functional behavior and convey it in such a manner. Unfortunately, even if this song is a recognition of Taylor explaining her numerous relationships, it doesn’t mean that this cycle will stop. Recognition IS NOT betterment.
Yes, recognition is the first step towards betterment. But if Taylor actually wants to find real love, achieve emotional intimacy with a partner, and have a lifelong healthy relationship, she must put the hard work into therapy to heal her traumas. Only recognizing these non-functional behaviors is not enough – she must put in the work to better these behaviors that are clearly not functional.
In the end, ‘The Bolter’ is a very special song that reveals Taylor’s reconnaissance of her non-functional behaviors when pursuing a relationship. It poses the very important question of whether Taylor is willing to put in work to heal and better herself or if will she continue to play the same move over and over and continue to feel the need like she must bolt.
‘The Bolter’ remains one of the most personal and vulnerable songs of The Tortured Poets Department, bringing a fresh take on Taylor’s relationships and perhaps it is for this very reason that ‘The Bolter’ is my personal favorite from the entire album.
Dear Reader 